i am recovering today after being swatted in the face with a dish towel with the force of a thousand horses.
did i mention by my husband.
yes, please it is time to call the authorities, i am pretty sure he is out to get me.
it all started sunday evening. i was greatly involved in the bbc series north and south when my husband came in from taking our fatty bulldog out for a potty break. unfortunately they didn’t come alone, soon joining our series experience was a big black fly.
now as some of you know we live in a 300 square foot apartment, and a fly just feels like an extra unwanted guest. so i said to andrew, “can you please get rid of the fly for me.”
some how andrew and i always come up without the essential tools that my parents always seem to have. like a fly swatter. i am not sure if you just slowly accumulate these things over the years, or if we should have added them to our wedding registry.
regardless, in comes andrew holding one of our dish towels. i said quickly to him, “you have got to be kidding me.” and he said, “trust me, this will work.”
andrew is a very focused type of person, and when he narrows in on something he tends to lose the rest of the picture somewhere a long the line – like lets say…my face.
so as i was sitting there deeply engrossed in my romantic north and south – i guess the fly must have passed by my head, because the next thing i know it felt like lightening slapping me right in the face.
i seriously crumpled over, and started to cry because it had just shocked me so bad.
andrew ran to my side and was just saying over and over again, “oh my goodness oh my goodness tiffany, i am so sorry, i didn’t realize it would hit you, i am so sorry, oh tiffany.”
once i had determined my nose wasn’t broken and my eyeball wasn’t hanging out of my socket, i began to laugh.
andrew had brought me ice, and his face was so painfully sorry that even my laughter didn’t seem to ease how terrible he felt.
the rest of the night i had a HUGE red streak all the the way across the right side of my face, and this morning my eye is still pretty fuzzy.
andrew said that he had seen it a little from the corner of his eye, he said, “oh tiffany it was terrible, you were just sitting there smiling at sleeping addis next to you, and the next thing i new you were down for the count.”
so this is marriage my friends.
at least this is MY marriage.
this is for sure a classic tiffany and andrew moment.
one in which i plan to use to my advantage as much as possible.
{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
Oh my, this made me giggle with delight. Sorry for your pain & all but it’s funny. People should totally register for fly swatters. Duh.
i know i can’t believe the lack of class i have for not registering for a fly swatter. i figured you would get much enjoyment out of this, i just wish it could have been caught on film. we would have totally won the grand prize on americans funniest home videos. i might contemplate an re-take…
This made me laugh! Your writing is so witty, btw. Hope you, TPS , fly- swatting/face-smacking husband and fatty bulldog are having a great summer.
Mireille you are always such the sweetest! I love getting visits from you all and little Oliver! I always feel like I am so distracted when you come in though, and don’t spend enough time saying hello. But I hope you guys are having a wonderful summer, though I suppose it is coming to a close now.